Wednesday, September 9, 2009


On hiatus until after the wedding! Too much stuff going on.

Thursday, September 3, 2009


If your child is not old enough to know what a computer is, they do not need a Twitter / Facebook account with you posting updates as "them."

Thank you.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Nixed Wedding Traditions

As my wedding draws closer, and as we both get more tired of wedding planning, I'm realizing we are skipping a few wedding traditions. Yes, we're getting married in the traditional Catholic ceremony but after that, all bets are off. I don't understand the point to a lot of wedding traditions. I think some couples do them just "because it's tradition" but that isn't a reason for us. If I could give a 20-minute monologue during the reception, I would. But then I would also offend people who did these things and who think they're probably good ideas. So, here is a list of what we're skipping and why:

- Guest book. There's no point to a guest book because a) we have your addresses since we just mailed you invitations and b) no one writes anything besides "Good luck!" or "Congratulations!" Considering most guest books sell for $20 for 60-pages (of which, only about 8 will be written on), you might as well flush that money down the toilet.

- Cake cutting. I don't understand the significance of cutting the cake together. It's supposed to symbolize...that you both like dessert? That you can tandem operate a knife? Couples spend $40 on an engraved cake cutter they'll never use again, so this one's out. Plus, I hate hate HATE it when couples smash the cake in each other's faces. It's unnecessary and gross.

-Unity candle. The unity candle symbolizes the two families coming together...but doesn't the entire ceremony and marriage symbolize that a lot better than a $3 candle?

- Groom's cake - I wasn't really aware of this one until my Mom asked if I was having one. When I asked what the point is, she said it was a separate cake just for the groom. I guess it's usually done in the South where grooms tend to prefer liquor-soaked cakes, but I say

- Bouquet toss / garter toss - no one enjoys this. Yeah, it's supposed to be "the next one to get married" but when has that ever come true? When has a girl caught the bouquet and then her boyfriend proposes the following weekend? Never! No guy wants to catch the garter, either. It basically just points out all of the single people and there's no reason for that.

- Ice sculpture. Okay, not really a tradition but you pay upwards of $200 for something that is reduced to a puddle of water. In case you weren't aware, you can get the same end result from simply pouring a cup of water out. I have seen some ice sculptures where you pour a warm beer down the top and put your glass at the bottom, and it comes out icy cold. That's cool and useful, but having some douchy sculpture of your initials or a swan or something is lame.

I'm sooooooooo glad my fiancee never had a childhood dream of a fairytale wedding of ice sculptures and silver plated guest books.