Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Michael Cera is Banned!

After watching Scott Pilgrim vs. The World this past weekend, I looked up America's beloved Michael Cera on Wikipedia.  I was scrolling through his body of work and realized, Holy crap!  I've seen five of his movies and liked a grand total of zero of them.  So on this date, February 23 of 2011, I do hereby declare that I am banning all movies starring Michael Cera.  I think part of it his him, and part of it is he acts in not-so-great movies.  (I was going to use the word shitty but my 4-year old nephew has this blog read to him verbatim).  Either way - I apologize to you, Mr. Cera but I will never see another of your films.  Even if (God forbid) you take over the role of Iron Man.

For those curious, here are the five Michael Cera movies I have seen and thoroughly not enjoyed - Scott Pilgrim vs. The World, , Nick & Norah's Infinite PlaylistSuperbad (aka the most overhyped movie of 2007), Juno (which I already complained about two years ago) and Year One (sadly, the best of his body of work).

Monday, February 21, 2011

Were You Over...?

The other day, I left my cubicle at work to take care of some business in the bathroom (stay with me here). I was gone for a reasonable amount of time and promptly returned to my desk.  The girl that sits next to me said, "Oh, I thought you left early for lunch."  Not wanting to go into any detail about my lavatory escapades, I simply replied, "Nope."

Then she asked, "Were you over talking to Phillip on the other side?"  I said, "Uh, no" hoping that would be the end of it.

She then asked, "Were you over having fun talking to Brandon about the email project?"  I could see that there was no winning so I just smiled and said, "Yeah, something like that" but in my head I'm thinking COME ON WOMAN!  CAN'T A GUY GO TAKE A CRAP AT WORK AND NOT BE QUESTIONED ABOUT WHERE HE'S BEEN?!??!

Saturday, February 19, 2011

The Gods of Cheesy Music

This guy I work with came over to my desk the other day.  As per usual, I had my earphones in because I don't like talking to anyone.  The guy asked me what I was listening to.  Of course, "I Touch Myself" by The Divinyls was playing and he started to lean in closer to see my iPod screen.

I quickly pressed the skip button to go to the next track which (of course!) was "(I've Had) The Time of My Life" from the Dirty Dancing soundtrack.

At that point, I knew the Gods of Cheesy Music were solidly against me, so I just shoved my iPod under the hard drive tower and told him I was listening to some '90s music.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

99 Cents

The Wife and I recently had something of a house party in our little condo, and I'm proud to say I got a lot of good stuff from the 99¢ Only Store nearby.  I knew we would have to spend money on the important things (alcohol, main food dishes) but knew we could probably save quite a few bucks if we shopped at the 99¢ store.

I got plates, napkins, cups and utensils from there as well as a few food items (condiments, dips), and a bunch of serving trays and dishes.  It's definitely worth it to check out these stores.  After all, who remembers utensils after a party is over?

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

LA Versus L.A. - Food

I hate to say it but New Orleans was kind of unimpressive with its food.  Don't get me wrong, there were a few places that we really loved (Felix's, EAT) but after Day 2, we were tired of seeing gumbo and etouffee on every single menu we looked at.  There just wasn't a lot of variety in the French Quarter, which is something I truly love about Los Angeles.

The other thing kind of weird about the food in New Orleans was that most every dish at most every restaurant was priced around $10-$14.  There weren't a lot of places you could get something for $6, and only a handful of places that would cost upwards of $40 per person.  It just got a little tiring going from restaurant to restaurant and seeing the same plate of jambalaya for $12 everywhere you go.  We did get out of the French Quarter for two meals and had some different experiences but if you're spending most of your time in the FQ, don't expect a lot of variety.

Advantage: Los Angeles.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

LA Versus L.A. - Bars

Ah, Bourbon Street.  Yes, it's a kind of touristy thing to do but it's also a ton of fun especially because it's about 20 bars all with NO cover charge.  Some bars are just for drinking, while others serve a full menu, or are good for dancing, karaoke singing, people watching or listening to live music.  All of this in one mile -- again, with NO cover charge.  You can barely find a continuous mile of bars/clubs on one street in Los Angeles and if you did, you'd be paying $15 for parking ($20 for "premium) and probably a $20 cover charge at each place.

Advantage: New Orleans.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

LA versus L.A. - Sports

The Wife and I recently took a weeklong trip to New Orleans, Louisiana and it was a lot of fun.  She took about 600 photos and sent an email out to some friends and family recapping the experience.  I won't attempt to recreate either but will mention some things I truly love/dislike about New Orleans, LA and contrast them with some things I like/don't like about my fair city, Los Angeles.

So here is the first installment, regarding sports.  In New Orleans, everyone is a New Orleans Saints fan.  We got into town on the day of the Seahwawks/Saints playoff game and caught the miserable second half of the game at a bar.  Even though they lost, there were tons of people wearing Saints gear the remainder of the week (and I suspect, year round).  In Los Angeles, you could randomly ask 20 people if they like the Dodgers, and you'd probably get an equal number of responses of "Yes" or "No, I like the Yankees"/"Who are the Dodgers?"/"Sorry I don't watch basketball."  New Orleans is a city that truly loves and supports their flagship team, no matter what.

Advantage: New Orleans.

Thursday, February 3, 2011


First things first -- the Wife is NOT pregnant.  I couldn't think of anything better suited to title this blog post, but I'll go ahead and state again, The Wife is not pregnant.

So.  One of the things that terrifies me about being a parent is the thought of having a daughter.  Don't get me wrong - I think very highly of the opposite sex and am fortunate to be surrounded by great, strong women in my family and my friendships.  But the thought of raising a girl from birth seems, to me, infinitely more terrifying than raising a boy.

Comedian Jay Mohr once said that when you raise a boy, you worry about his penis.  When you raise a girl, you worry about everyone else's.  It's not only that, but also the possibility of high levels of drama and the fact that I grew up with a brother and know very little about being girly.

But I may be coming around to the possibility of one day being a father to a girl.  At Christmas, we hung out with The Wife's family, including her cousin and his wife, who have an adorable 3 (or 4?) year old daughter.  We were talking to them and they were saying that she is more into comic books and wrestling around than she is girly things.  If you gave her a choice between a Barbie doll and a Batman figure, she'd choose Batman.  She would also choose watching MMA over watching a Dora.  She's not a tomboy but then again, it may be too early to tell.  The point is she was absolutely adorable, into nerdy things and made me much less frightened about raising a daughter one day.