Awk. Ward.

I got an email from my high school about a Christmas thing this past weekend. It advertised an appearance by Santa, crafts and free breakfast. In my head, I pictured stacks of pancakes and muffins, and 10-15 local artists selling homemade crafts so we could pick up some Christmas gifts. The campus is maybe 5 minutes from where we live, so The Wife and I went to check it out. Plus, I figured I could show her where I went to school.

Here's what we ended up getting: Santa Claus (as promised!), mini-bagels and donuts (well, it was free) and tables set up with craft supplies so kids could make stuff (not a local artist in sight). Crap! We felt pretty weird since we have no child of our own and I don't want to look like a molester and/or kidnapper. Quick, time for Plan B: grab a bagel and donut (respectively) and then flee! That was a fine plan, you see, until a girl from my graduating class spotted me and said hello with her husband and kid. #$*(!, we've been seen! We talked for two awkward minutes and then got the heck out of there.

Not really how I envisioned my Saturday morning going but I have to give props to my Wife for going along with my stupid crazy ideas sometimes. Perhaps I should have emailed back for more information before we drove over there.

Earthquake Stories

Last week, there was a mild earthquake at 1:25 on a Thursday, so during the work day. I was in my car at the time and felt my car sway a bit. It honestly felt like a strong Santa Anita breeze - it was no big deal. I had to clock back in so I walked back to find people from my office standing outside. Was there an order to evacuate? I decided to take my chances since I'm new and I wanted to clock back in, at least. I walked back to my desk and sure enough, my least favorite thing about earthquakes started - earthquake stories.

Without fail, whenever an earthquake happens on work time, you can expect the following scenario to happen: 1. mild earthquake happens; 2. people freak out; 3. everyone spends the next 20-30 minutes standing around talking about the earthquake and sharing earthquake stories. This. Annoys. The. Crap. Out. Of. Me.

Why? Because there is no story. Unless something actually falls and breaks, there is no story worth telling. This was a 4.2 and the building barely shook. There is nothing to talk about. Anytime someone came back from lunch, the first thing someone would ask is, "Did you feel the earthquake?" Then they'd talk about the magnitude of this earthquake, what it felt like, where they were when it hit and any other irrelevant stories barely related to earthquakes just so they could kill time. Get back to work, you assholes!

Twihype

Generally speaking, I am not a fan of hype. In fact, anything that becomes too hyped up tends to turn me off. I don't want to believe in hype and I'd like to form my own opinion on my own time. Plus, I find hyped things are not as good as they're made out to be. Mostly I'm right (Superbad, Juno, Coldplay, Harry Potter), but I'll admit sometimes I'm wrong (White Stripes, The Office).

Alas, this is the reason I won't be going to see Twilight this coming weekend...or anytime soon. From what I know of the story (a vampire and a teenage girl fall for each other), it sounds like more of a teenage romance. My fianceé read the first book and admitted it was cheesy, yet it sucked her in. It sounded to us like the vampire could just bite the girl and turn her into a vampire and then they'd live happily ever after. After all, if he is capable of not being a scary, evil vampire, surely she can, too. Then they'd both be immortal and could spend every day together. Seems like we solved their teenage romance problem in once sentence.

I just wish this friggin' movie would come out already so I can stop seeing TV commercials, newspaper ads and blogs (mine included) all over the place.